《Twilight 暮光之城Ⅰ——暮色》 （中英文对照·完结）

阿汤哥

“只有一个例外。”他更正道。“假设。”

“好吧，只有一个例外，那么。”我对他的合作感到很震惊，但我力图表现得不经意些。

“这到底是怎么做到的？有没有限制条件？那个某人……怎么能够……在恰当的时间找到另一个人？他是怎么知道她陷入困境的？”我想知道自己这些费解的问题有没有意义。

“只是假设？”他问道。

“当然。”

“好吧，如果……那个某人……”

“让我们称他为‘乔’。”我提议道。

他挖苦地一笑。“乔，那么。如果乔有留心注意的话，时间也许就不需要掐得那么准了。”他摇了摇头，转着眼睛。“只有你才能在这么小的城镇里遇上麻烦。你知道，你可能打破了他们十年来的犯罪率统计数据。”

“我们正在谈一个假设的案例。”我冷淡地提醒他。

他冲我大笑起来，眼里盈满了暖意。

“好吧，我们确实是。”他赞同道。“我们可以称你为‘简’吗？”

“你到底是怎么知道的？”我再也没法抑制住自己的情绪，问道。我意识到自己又在向他侧过身去

他似乎动摇了，为心底的某个两难选择左右为难着。他的目光紧紧地锁住了我的双眼，我猜他正在抉择，是否要把真相告诉我。

=======================

"Just one exception," he corrected, "hypothetically."

"All right, with one exception, then." I was thrilled that he was playing
along, but I tried to seem casual.

"How does that work? What are the limitations? How would… that someone…
find someone else at exactly the right time? How would he know she was in
trouble?" I wondered if my convoluted questions even made sense.

"Hypothetically?" he asked.

"Sure."

"Well, if… that someone…"

"Let's call him 'Joe,'" I suggested.

He smiled wryly. "Joe, then. If Joe had been paying attention, the timing
wouldn't have needed to be quite so exact." He shook his head, rolling
his eyes. "Only you could get into trouble in a town this small. You
would have devastated their crime rate statistics for a decade, you know."

"We were speaking of a hypothetical case," I reminded him frostily.

He laughed at me, his eyes warm.

"Yes, we were," he agreed. "Shall we call you 'Jane'?"

"How did you know?" I asked, unable to curb my intensity. I realized I
was leaning toward him again.

He seemed to be wavering, torn by some internal dilemma. His eyes locked
with mine, and I guessed he was making the decision right then whether or
not to simply tell me the truth.

阿汤哥

“你可以信任我，你知道的。”我低声说着。我向前伸出手，不假思索地，想要触碰他交叠着的双手，但他不着痕迹地把手移开了，我只好把手收回来。

“我不知道我还有没有别的选择。”他的声音几近耳语。“我错了——你比我所钦佩的还要善于观察。”

“我觉得你通常都是正确的。”

“我曾经是。”他又摇了摇头。“同样，在另一件事上我也错看你了。你不是一块吸引意外的吸铁石——这个定义太宽泛了。你简直是一块专吸灾难的吸铁石。如果方圆十英里内有任何危险物，它都一定会找到你的。”

“那你把自己归进危险物里了？”我猜测着。

他的脸立刻变得冷冰冰的，毫无表情。“毫无疑问。”

我又一次把手伸过桌子——无视他再次不着痕迹地把手拉回去的努力——羞怯地用指尖触到了他的手背。他的肌肤冰冷坚硬，好像石头一样。

“谢谢。”我的声音里盈满了热切的感激之情。“这是第二次了。”

他的表情柔和起来。“别让我们有机会试第三次，好吗？”

我皱起眉，但还是点了点头。他把手从我的指尖下移开，两只手都放到了桌子下。但他向我靠了过来

“我一路跟着你到天使港。”他承认着，完全收不住话头。“在这之前我从没这样努力地保护过某个特定的人。而且这比我原本相信的还要困难重重。但也可能是因为你，才会这样困难。一般人就算在这里耗上一整天也不会遇上那么多的灾难。”他停了下来。我想知道他跟踪我会不会让我觉得困扰。但相反的，我却感到了一阵奇特的满足感。他注视着我，也许是在怀疑着为什么我的唇瓣会弯起来，情不自禁地微笑着。

==============================
"You can trust me, you know," I murmured. I reached forward, without

thinking, to touch his folded hands, but he slid them away minutely, and
I pulled my hand back.

"I don't know if I have a choice anymore." His voice was almost a
whisper. "I was wrong — you're much more observant than I gave you credit
for."

"I thought you were always right."

"I used to be." He shook his head again. "I was wrong about you on one
other thing, as well. You're not a magnet for accidents — that's not a
broad enough classification. You are a magnet for trouble. If there is
anything dangerous within a ten-mile radius, it will invariably find you."

"And you put yourself into that category?" I guessed.

His face turned cold, expressionless. "Unequivocally."

I stretched my hand across the table again — ignoring him when he pulled
back slightly once more — to touch the back of his hand shyly with my
fingertips. His skin was cold and hard, like a stone.

"Thank you." My voice was fervent with gratitude. "That's twice now."

His face softened. "Let's not try for three, agreed?"

I scowled, but nodded. He moved his hand out from under mine, placing
both of his under the table. But he leaned toward me.

"I followed you to Port Angeles," he admitted, speaking in a rush. "I've
never tried to keep a specific person alive before, and it's much more
troublesome than I would have believed. But that's probably just because
it's you. Ordinary people seem to make it through the day without so many
catastrophes." He paused. I wondered if it should bother me that he was
following me; instead I felt a strange surge of pleasure. He stared,
maybe wondering why my lips were curving into an involuntary smile.

阿汤哥

“你有没有想过，也许第一次的时候我就应该气数已尽了，因为那辆货车，而你却改变了命运的走向？”我推测着，想要转移自己的注意力。

“那不是第一次。”他说着，声音小得几乎听不见。我吃惊地看着他，他却低着头。“在我第一次遇见你的时候，你就在劫难逃了。”

他的话让我感到一阵恐惧的战栗，关于第一天的记忆生生闯入脑海：他狂暴的，黑色的眼睛怒视着……但是，当我意识到他在的时候，那股压倒性的安全感阻止了我不堪回首的回忆。这时候他抬起头来，看着我的眼睛，却发现我的眼里没有半点恐惧的痕迹。

“你还记得吗？”他问道，天使一样的容颜有些黯然。

“是的。”我非常平静。

“你居然还敢坐在这里。”他的声音里有点难以置信的味道。他挑起一侧眉头。

“是啊，我还能坐在这里……是因为你。”我顿了顿。“是因为今天，不知怎的你知道怎么找到我……？”我催促着。

他紧紧地闭着嘴唇，眯缝起眼睛注视着我，又开始踌躇了。他的眼睛飞快地掠过我依然满满当当的盘子，然后看向我。

“你吃，我说。”他讨价还价道。
我飞快地舀起一个馄饨，放进嘴里。

“这实际操作起来更困难些——我是说跟着你。通常我可以轻而易举地找到别人，即使我之前从未读过他们的心。”他担忧地看着我，我感觉到自己僵住了。我让自己吞咽了一下，然后戳起另一个馄饨，丢进嘴里。
=======================

"Did you ever think that maybe my number was up the first time, with the
van, and that you've been interfering with fate?" I speculated,
distracting myself.

"That wasn't the first time," he said, and his voice was hard to hear. I
stared at him in amazement, but he was looking down. "Your number was up
the first time I met you."

I felt a spasm of fear at his words, and the abrupt memory of his violent
black glare that first day… but the overwhelming sense of safety I felt
in his presence stifled it. By the time he looked up to read my eyes,
there was no trace of fear in them.

"You remember?" he asked, his angel's face grave.

"Yes." I was calm.

"And yet here you sit." There was a trace of disbelief in his voice; he
raised one eyebrow.

"Yes, here I sit… because of you." I paused. "Because somehow you knew
how to find me today… ?" I prompted.

He pressed his lips together, staring at me through narrowed eyes,
deciding again. His eyes flashed down to my full plate, and then back to
me.

"You eat, I'll talk," he bargained.

I quickly scooped up another ravioli and popped it in my mouth.

"It's harder than it should be — keeping track of you. Usually I can find
someone very easily, once I've heard their mind before." He looked at me
anxiously, and I realized I had frozen. I made myself swallow, then
stabbed another ravioli and tossed it in.

阿汤哥

“我一直监视着杰西卡，但没太用心——就像我说的，只有你才会在天使港遇到麻烦——刚开始我没注意到你脱离了队伍，开始一个人闲逛。然后，当我意识到你没跟她在一起的时候，我赶到在她脑海里看到的那家书店找你。我敢说你根本就没进去，向南走了……我知道你很快就会掉头回来的。所以我只是等着你，随意地搜索着街道上的人的想法——看看有没有人注意到你，这样我就能知道你在哪里了。我没有理由担心的……但我奇怪地不安着……”他陷入了沉思，他的目光穿过我，看着我想象不出来的事物。

“我开始兜着圈子，仍在……听着。太阳快要下山了，那样我就能下车徒步跟着你了。然后——”他停了下来，突如其来的狂怒让他咬紧了牙关。他竭力让自己冷静下来。

“然后怎么了？”我低声问道。他的视线越过我的头顶，继续说道。

“我听到了他们在想什么。”他咆哮着，上唇微微卷曲起来，露出了牙齿。“我在他的脑海里看到了你的脸。”他忽然向前倾侧，一只胳膊出现在桌子上。他用手掌覆住了自己的眼睛。这个动作如此迅速，把我吓了一跳。

“这实在很……艰难——你想象不到这对我来说有多难——只是把你带走，留下他们……的性命。”他的声音掩在了手臂之下。“我本来可以让你跟杰西卡和安吉拉一起走的，但我担心如果你让我一个人待着，我会回去找他们。”他用几近耳语的声音承认道。

我静静地坐着，一片茫然，我的思绪完全混乱了。我把双手交叠在膝盖上，虚弱地靠着椅背。他依然把脸藏在手掌之下，一动不动，就好像他是由和他的肌肤相似的石头雕刻出来的一样。（因为前面说他的肌肤冷得像石头，而不是像接力里说的，和他的肌肤质地纹理相似的石头。。。）

最终，他抬起头，他的眼睛搜寻着我的视线，眼里充满了他的疑问。

“你准备好回家了吗？”他问道。

“我准备好离开了。”我更正道，因为我们将要一起度过开车回家的那一小时而过度兴奋着。我还没准备好跟他说再见。

=========================

"I was keeping tabs on Jessica, not carefully — like I said, only you
could find trouble in Port Angeles — and at first I didn't notice when
you took off on your own. Then, when I realized that you weren't with her
anymore, I went looking for you at the bookstore I saw in her head. I
could tell that you hadn't gone in, and that you'd gone south… and I knew
you would have to turn around soon. So I was just waiting for you,
randomly searching through the thoughts of people on the street — to see
if anyone had noticed you so I would know where you were. I had no reason
to be worried… but I was strangely anxious…" He was lost in thought,
staring past me, seeing things I couldn't imagine.

"I started to drive in circles, still… listening. The sun was finally
setting, and I was about to get out and follow you on foot. And then —"
He stopped, clenching his teeth together in sudden fury. He made an
effort to calm himself.

"Then what?" I whispered. He continued to stare over my head.

"I heard what they were thinking," he growled, his upper lip curling
slightly back over his teeth. "I saw your face in his mind." He suddenly
leaned forward, one elbow appearing on the table, his hand covering his
eyes. The movement was so swift it startled me.

"It was very… hard — you can't imagine how hard — for me to simply take
you away, and leave them… alive." His voice was muffled by his arm. "I
could have let you go with Jessica and Angela, but I was afraid if you
left me alone, I would go looking for them," he admitted in a whisper.

I sat quietly, dazed, my thoughts incoherent. My hands were folded in my
lap, and I was leaning weakly against the back of the seat. He still had
his face in his hand, and he was as still as if he'd been carved from the
stone his skin resembled.

Finally he looked up, his eyes seeking mine, full of his own questions.

"Are you ready to go home?" he asked.

"I'm ready to leave," I qualified, overly grateful that we had the
hour-long ride home together. I wasn't ready to say goodbye to him.

阿汤哥

那个女招待出现了，就好像她被召唤了一样。或者她根本就一直在看着。

“有什么能为您效劳的吗？”她问爱德华。

“我们准备结账，谢谢。”他的声音静静的，却有些粗暴，依然反映着我们谈话的气氛。这似乎让她困惑了。他抬起头，等待着。

“好——好的。”她结结巴巴地说。“这是您的账单。”她从黑色围裙前面的口袋里拿出一个小小的皮夹子，递给他。

他手里已经拿着一张钞票了。他把它夹进夹子里，立刻递还给她。

“不用找了。”他微笑着，然后站了起来。我笨拙地站了起来。

她又一次向他充满魅力的一笑。“祝你晚上过得愉快。”

当他感谢她的时候，他的目光根本没从我身上移开。我强忍着没笑出来。

他跟在我身后向门口走去，依然小心翼翼地不让自己碰到我。我想起了杰西卡说的她和迈克的关系，他们已经快到初吻阶段了。我叹了口气。爱德华似乎听见了，他好奇地低下头看我。我注视着人行道，对他似乎不能知道我的想法感到欣慰。

他打开了乘客座的门，当我上车的时候他扶住门，然后在我身后轻轻地把门关上了。我看着他从车前走过，又一次惊讶于他惊人的优雅。也许我从现在开始就得习惯这一点了——但我还习惯。我有种感觉，爱德华不是那种能让人习以为常的人。

一坐进车里，他就发动了引擎，把暖气开到最大。现在变得很冷了，我猜想好天气已经到头了。但是，穿着他的夹克让我很温暖，趁他不注意的时候我总是偷偷地嗅着衣服上的香气。

爱德华把车开进车流里，显然看都没看，就娴熟地转弯向高速公路开去。

“现在，”他意味深长地说道。“轮到你了。”

==================

The waitress appeared as if she'd been called. Or watching.

"How are we doing?" she asked Edward.

"We're ready for the check, thank you." His voice was quiet, rougher,
still reflecting the strain of our conversation. It seemed to muddle her.
He looked up, waiting.

"S-sure," she stuttered. "Here you go." She pulled a small leather folder
from the front pocket of her black apron and handed it to him.

There was a bill in his hand already. He slipped it into the folder and
handed it right back to her.

"No change." He smiled. Then he stood up, and I scrambled awkwardly to my
feet.

She smiled invitingly at him again. "You have a nice evening."

He didn't look away from me as he thanked her. I suppressed a smile.

He walked close beside me to the door, still careful not to touch me. I
remembered what Jessica had said about her relationship with Mike, how
they were almost to the first-kiss stage. I sighed. Edward seemed to hear
me, and he looked down curiously. I looked at the sidewalk, grateful that
he didn't seem to be able to know what I was thinking.

He opened the passenger door, holding it for me as I stepped in, shutting
it softly behind me. I watched him walk around the front of the car,
amazed, yet again, by how graceful he was. I probably should have been
used to that by now — but I wasn't. I had a feeling Edward wasn't the
kind of person anyone got used to.

Once inside the car, he started the engine and turned the heater on high.
It had gotten very cold, and I guessed the good weather was at an end. I
was warm in his jacket, though, breathing in the scent of it when I
thought he couldn't see.

Edward pulled out through the traffic, apparently without a glance,
flipping around to head toward the freeway.

"Now," he said significantly, "it's your turn."


END

阿汤哥

第九章 理论

“我能再问一个问题吗？”我恳求道。爱德华在安静的街道上越开越快。他似乎根本就没在注意路况

。

他叹了口气。

“就一个。”他同意了。他的双唇又抿紧成一条谨慎的线条。

“嗯……你说你知道我没进书店，而且我往南走了。我只是想弄明白你是怎么知道的。”

他看向别处，思索着。

“我认为我们都不应该逃避的。”我喃喃地抱怨道。

他几乎微笑起来。

“好吧，那么，我一路跟随着你的气息。”他看着路面，让我有时间恢复脸上的镇定。对此我根本想

不出任何令人满意的回答，但我小心地把它归档，以供日后研究。我试着重新集中注意力。既然他终

于开始解释了，我可不准备让他就此打住。

“还有，你还没回答我最开始问的一个问题……”我在拖延时间。

他不赞同地看着我：“哪一个？”

“这是怎么起作用的——读心术？你能读任何地方，任何人的心吗？你是怎么做到的？你家里别的成

员能……？”我觉得自己很愚蠢，居然为了掩饰自己而要求他澄清一切。

“这可不止一个问题。”他指出。我只是十指交缠，然后注视着他，等待着。
=========================

9. THEORY


"Can I ask just one more?" I pleaded as Edward accelerated much too
quickly down the quiet street. He didn't seem to be paying any attention
to the road.

He sighed.

"One," he agreed. His lips pressed together into a cautious line.

"Well… you said you knew I hadn't gone into the bookstore, and that I had
gone south. I was just wondering how you knew that."

He looked away, deliberating.

"I thought we were past all the evasiveness," I grumbled.

He almost smiled.

"Fine, then. I followed your scent." He looked at the road, giving me
time to compose my face. I couldn't think of an acceptable response to
that, but I filed it carefully away for future study. I tried to refocus.
I wasn't ready to let him be finished, now that he was finally explaining
things.

"And then you didn't answer one of my first questions…" I stalled.

He looked at me with disapproval. "Which one?"

"How does it work — the mind-reading thing? Can you read anybody's mind,
anywhere? How do you do it? Can the rest of your family… ?" I felt silly,
asking for clarification on make-believe.

"That's more than one," he pointed out. I simply intertwined my fingers
and gazed at him, waiting.

阿汤哥

“不，只有我是这样。而且我也不是可以听到任何地方任何人的心。我得靠得相当近。越熟悉某人的

……‘声音’，我就能从越远的地方听到他们。但始终，不能超过几英里的距离。”他停下来想了想

。“就好比在一个巨大的挤满人的礼堂里，同一时刻每个人都在说话。那只是一阵嗡嗡声——一阵嗡

嗡的背景声。直到我把注意里集中在某个声音上，他们所想的才会清晰起来。”

“大多数时候我都会把它们拒之耳外——实在是太烦人了。而且这样会能让我显得更正常些”——他

说这话时皱了皱眉——“我就不会出人意料地回答某人心中未出口的疑问。”

“为什么你认为你听不到我的‘心声’呢？”我好奇地问道。

他看着我，眼里写满了不可思议。

“我不知道。”他喃喃低语道。“我唯一的猜想是也许你的脑子运作的方式和所有别的人都不一样。

就像是你的思想在AM频道，而我只能收到FM。”他向我咧嘴一笑，忽然打趣道。

“我的脑子不正常？我是个怪胎？”这些话比预期的更让我困扰——也许是因为他的推测正中要害。

我时常怀疑着这一点，而当它被证实时让我感到局促不安。

“我能听到脑子里的声音，而你却在担心你是怪胎。”他大笑着。“别担心，那只是个理论……”他

的脸绷紧了。“现在让我们回到你的理论上吧。”

我叹了口气。从何说起？

“我们现在都不应该逃避，对吧？”他温柔地提醒我。

我头一次把目光从他脸上移开，搜肠刮肚地想要找出合适的言语来表达。我无意中注意到了速度计。

“我的天啊！”我喊出声来。“减速！”

“怎么了？”他吓了一跳，但车速并没有放慢。

=============================

"No, it's just me. And I can't hear anyone, anywhere. I have to be fairly
close. The more familiar someone's… 'voice' is, the farther away I can
hear them. But still, no more than a few miles." He paused thoughtfully.
"It's a little like being in a huge hall filled with people, everyone
talking at once. It's just a hum — a buzzing of voices in the background.
Until I focus on one voice, and then what they're thinking is clear.

"Most of the time I tune it all out — it can be very distracting. And
then it's easier to seem normal" — he frowned as he said the word — "when
I'm not accidentally answering someone's thoughts rather than their
words."

"Why do you think you can't hear me?" I asked curiously.

He looked at me, his eyes enigmatic.

"I don't know," he murmured. "The only guess I have is that maybe your

mind doesn't work the same way the rest of theirs do. Like your thoughts
are on the AM frequency and I'm only getting FM." He grinned at me,
suddenly amused.

"My mind doesn't work right? I'm a freak?" The words bothered me more
than they should — probably because his speculation hit home. I'd always
suspected as much, and it embarrassed me to have it confirmed.

"I hear voices in my mind and you're worried that you're the freak," he
laughed. "Don't worry, it's just a theory…" His face tightened. "Which
brings us back to you."

I sighed. How to begin?

"Aren't we past all the evasions now?" he reminded me softly.

I looked away from his face for the first time, trying to find words. I
happened to notice the speedometer.

"Holy crow!" I shouted. "Slow down!"

"What's wrong?" He was startled. But the car didn't decelerate.

阿汤哥

“你开到了每小时一百英里！”我依然在大喊。我惊慌失措地看了一眼窗外，但外面太黑了，我什么

也看不见。路面上只有被前灯微蓝的光线照到的长长的一片能看得清。路两旁的森林就像两堵黑色的

墙——如果我们用这个速度冲出路面，它们会坚固得像铜墙铁壁一样。
“放轻松，贝拉。”他转了转眼睛，还是没有减速。

“你想杀了我们吗？”我诘问道。

“我们不会撞车的。”

我试着调整自己的声音。“你为什么要这么匆忙呢？”

“我一向开这么快。”他转过头来，向我弯弯一笑。

“你给我看着路面！”

“我从没出过事故，贝拉——我甚至没有吃过罚单。”他咧嘴一笑，拍了拍他的额头。“内置雷达探

测器。”（接力这句翻成，车里装了雷达探测器。。。）

“很有趣。”我怒气冲冲地说着。“查理是个cop，还记得吧？我是被教育着要遵纪守法长大的。另

外，即使你把我们变成了树干上的沃尔沃夹心饼，你也许还是可以全身而退。”

“也许。”他发出一声短促的、勉强的笑声，赞同道。“但你不能。”他叹息道。我宽慰地看到指针

渐渐回落到八十英里处。“高兴了？”

“差不多。”

“我不喜欢开慢车。”他抱怨着。

“这叫慢？”

“就我的驾驶而言，相当中肯。”他忽然改变了话题。“我还等着听你的最新理论呢。”

==============================

"You're going a hundred miles an hour!" I was still shouting. I shot a
panicky glance out the window, but it was too dark to see much. The road
was only visible in the long patch of bluish brightness from the
headlights. The forest along both sides of the road was like a black wall
— as hard as a wall of steel if we veered off the road at this speed.

"Relax, Bella." He rolled his eyes, still not slowing.

"Are you trying to kill us?" I demanded.

"We're not going to crash."

I tried to modulate my voice. "Why are you in such a hurry?"

"I always drive like this." He turned to smile crookedly at me.

"Keep your eyes on the road!"

"I've never been in an accident, Bella — I've never even gotten a
ticket." He grinned and tapped his forehead. "Built-in radar detector."

"Very funny." I fumed. "Charlie's a cop, remember? I was raised to abide
by traffic laws. Besides, if you turn us into a Volvo pretzel around a
tree trunk, you can probably just walk away."

"Probably," he agreed with a short, hard laugh. "But you can't." He
sighed, and I watched with relief as the needle gradually drifted toward
eighty. "Happy?"

"Almost."

"I hate driving slow," he muttered.

"This is slow?"

"Enough commentary on my driving," he snapped. "I'm still waiting for
your latest theory."

阿汤哥

我咬住唇。他低头看着我，蜜糖似的眼神出奇地温柔。

“我不会笑的。”他保证道。

“我更怕你会生我的气。”

“有那么糟吗？”

“没错，相当严重。”

他等待着。我埋头看着自己的双手，这样我就看不见他的表情了。

“接着说。”他的声音很平静。

“我不知道从何说起。”我坦白道。

“为什么不从头说起呢……你说你不是自己想出来的。”

“不是。”

“你是从哪儿开始的——一本书？一部电影？”他试探着说。

“不——是周六，在海滩上。”我冒险瞄了一眼他的脸。他看上去很困惑。

“我碰巧遇到了一位世交好友——雅克布?布莱克。”我继续说道。“我还是个婴儿的时候，他爸爸

和查理就已经是老朋友了。”

他依然一脸困惑。

========================

I bit my lip. He looked down at me, his honey eyes unexpectedly gentle.

"I won't laugh," he promised.

"I'm more afraid that you'll be angry with me."

"Is it that bad?"

"Pretty much, yeah."

He waited. I was looking down at my hands, so I couldn't see his
expression.

"Go ahead." His voice was calm.

"I don't know how to start," I admitted.

"Why don't you start at the beginning… you said you didn't come up with
this on your own."

"No."

"What got you started — a book? A movie?" he probed.

"No — it was Saturday, at the beach." I risked a glance up at his face.
He looked puzzled.

"I ran into an old family friend —Jacob Black," I continued. "His dad and
Charlie have been friends since I was a baby."

He still looked confused.

阿汤哥

“他爸爸是奎鲁特人的长老之一。”我小心翼翼地看着他。他困惑的神情立刻凝在了脸上。“我们一

起散步——”我去掉了故事里关于我的阴谋的那部分“——他告诉了我一些古老的传说——只是想要

吓唬我，我想。他告诉了我一个……”我踌躇起来。

“继续。”他说。

“关于吸血鬼的传说。”我意识到自己在低语着。现在我再也不敢看他的脸了。但我看见他抓着方向

盘的指关节痉挛着绷紧了。

“然后你立刻就想到了我？”依然很平静。

“不。他……提到了你的家族。”

他沉默了，只是注视着路面。

我忽然担心起来，担心着想要保护雅克布。

“他只是觉得那是一个愚蠢的迷信。”我飞快地说道。“他没希望我把其中的任何内容当真。”这似

乎还不太够。我不得不承认道：“都是我的错，是我逼他告诉我的。”

“为什么？”

“劳伦说了一些关于你的话——她想要激怒我。然后部落里的一个年长的男孩说你的家族不会来保留

区，只是听起来他像是在暗示着别的意思。所以我把雅克布单独约了出来，哄骗他说了出来。”我垂

下头，承认道。

他大笑起来，把我吓了一跳。我抬起头瞪着他。他大笑着，眼神却显得很狂暴，他直视着前方。

“怎么哄骗他的？”他问道。

“我试图向他调情——但效果比我想象的还要好。”我回想着，语气里带了点怀疑的色彩。

========================

"His dad is one of the Quileute elders." I watched him carefully. His
confused expression froze in place. "We went for a walk —" I edited all
my scheming out of the story "— and he was telling me some old legends —
trying to scare me, I think. He told me one…" I hesitated.

"Go on," he said.

"About vampires." I realized I was whispering. I couldn't look at his
face now. But I saw his knuckles tighten convulsively on the wheel.

"And you immediately thought of me?" Still calm.

"No. He… mentioned your family."

He was silent, staring at the road.

I was worried suddenly, worried about protecting Jacob.

"He just thought it was a silly superstition," I said quickly. "He didn't
expect me to think anything of it." It didn't seem like enough; I had to
confess. "It was my fault, I forced him to tell me."

"Why?"

"Lauren said something about you — she was trying to provoke me. And an
older boy from the tribe said your family didn't come to the reservation,
only it sounded like he meant something different. So I got Jacob alone
and I tricked it out of him," I admitted, hanging my head.

He startled me by laughing. I glared up at him. He was laughing, but his
eyes were fierce, staring ahead.

"Tricked him how?" he asked.

"I tried to flirt — it worked better than I thought it would." Disbelief
colored my tone as I remembered.

阿汤哥

“我真想亲眼目睹那个情景。”他阴郁地轻笑着。“你还指责我把别人迷得神魂颠倒呢——可怜的雅克布?布莱克。”

我红着脸，转头看着自己这侧窗外的夜空。
“然后你做了什么？”一分钟以后，他问道。

“我在网上搜索了一下。”

“那证实了你的猜想吗？”他的声音听起来仅仅是感兴趣。但他的手紧紧地钳握住了方向盘。

“不。没有相符的内容。大多数内容都有点愚蠢。然后……”我停了下来。

“什么？”

“我决定了，这无关紧要。”我低语道。

“这无关紧要？”他的语气让我抬起头来——我最终打破了他小心翼翼地维持着的假面具。他的脸上写满了怀疑，还带着一丝让我害怕的愤怒。

“是的。”我柔声说道。“不管你是什么，这对我来说都无关紧要。”

生硬和嘲弄的色彩渗进了他的声音。“即使我是个怪物你也不在乎？即使我不是人类！”

“我不在乎。”

他沉默了，又一次直视着前方。他的神情阴暗而冷漠。

“你生气了。”我叹息道。“我本来应该什么也不说的。”
========================
"I'd like to have seen that." He chuckled darkly. "And you accused me of
dazzling people — poor Jacob Black."

I blushed and looked out my window into the night.

"What did you do then?" he asked after a minute.

"I did some research on the Internet."

"And did that convince you?" His voice sounded barely interested. But his
hands were clamped hard onto the steering wheel.

"No. Nothing fit. Most of it was kind of silly. And then…" I stopped.

"What?"

"I decided it didn't matter," I whispered.

"It didn't matter?" His tone made me look up — I had finally broken
through his carefully composed mask. His face was incredulous, with just
a hint of the anger I'd feared.

"No," I said softly. "It doesn't matter to me what you are."

A hard, mocking edge entered his voice. "You don't care if I'm a monster?
If I'm not human!"

"No."

He was silent, staring straight ahead again. His face was bleak and cold.

"You're angry," I sighed. "I shouldn't have said anything."

阿汤哥

“不。”他说道，但他的声音和他的表情一样生硬。“我很想知道你在想什么——即使你的想法愚蠢透顶。”

“所以我又错了？”我挑衅道。

“我不是在说这个。‘这无关紧要’！”他引述着我的话，咬紧了牙关。

“我是对的？”我喘息着说。

“这要紧吗？”

我深吸了一口气。

“不怎么要紧。”我顿了顿。“但我很好奇。”只是，我的声音维持着平静。

他忽然顺从起来：“你好奇什么？”

“你几岁了？”

“十七岁。”他迅速答道。

“你满十七岁多久了？”（我最爱的一段对话。。。）

当他注视着路面的时候，他的嘴唇扭曲起来。“有一阵子了。”他最终承认道。

“很好。”我笑了起来，对他依然对我坦诚这一点很高兴。他低下头，用警惕的眼神看着我，就像他之前所做的那样，那时他正担心着我会不会震惊得休克过去。因为受到这样的鼓励，我笑得更开怀了，而他皱起了眉头。

==========================

"No," he said, but his tone was as hard as his face. "I'd rather know
what you're thinking — even if what you're thinking is insane."

"So I'm wrong again?" I challenged.

"That's not what I was referring to. 'It doesn't matter'!" he quoted,
gritting his teeth together.

"I'm right?" I gasped.

"Does it matter?"

I took a deep breath.

"Not really." I paused. "But I am curious." My voice, at least, was
composed.

He was suddenly resigned. "What are you curious about?"

"How old are you?"

"Seventeen," he answered promptly.

"And how long have you been seventeen?"

His lips twitched as he stared at the road. "A while," he admitted at
last.

"Okay." I smiled, pleased that he was still being honest with me. He
stared down at me with watchful eyes, much as he had before, when he was
worried I would go into shock. I smiled wider in encouragement, and he
frowned.

阿汤哥

“不许笑——可你是怎么能够在白天出来的呢？”

他总算笑了。“鬼扯。”

“被阳光灼烧？”

“鬼扯。”

“睡在棺材里？”

“鬼扯。”他迟疑了片刻，他的声音带上了某种奇特的语气。“我不用睡觉。”

我用了一分钟才消化了这句话。“完全不用？”

“从来不用。”他说道，他的声音几不可闻。他转过头来，用一种渴望的神情看着我。那双金色的眸子抓住了我的眼睛，我完全丧失了思考的能力。我凝视着他，直到他看向别处为止。

“你还没问我那个最重要的问题。”现在他的声音又生硬起来了，当他再次看向我时，他的眼睛冷冰冰的。

我眨了眨眼，依然迷茫着。“哪一个？”

“你不关心我的日常饮食吗？”他挖苦地问道。

“哦。”我喃喃地说着。“那个。”

“是的，那个。”他的声音很阴冷。“你不想知道我是否饮血吗？”

我畏缩着。“嗯，雅克布有说过一些这方面的内容。”

===================================

"Don't laugh — but how can you come out during the daytime?"

He laughed anyway. "Myth."

"Burned by the sun?"

"Myth."

"Sleeping in coffins?"

"Myth." He hesitated for a moment, and a peculiar tone entered his voice.
"I can't sleep."

It took me a minute to absorb that. "At all?"

"Never," he said, his voice nearly inaudible. He turned to look at me
with a wistful expression. The golden eyes held mine, and I lost my train
of thought. I stared at him until he looked away.

"You haven't asked me the most important question yet." His voice was

hard now, and when he looked at me again his eyes were cold.

I blinked, still dazed. "Which one is that?"

"You aren't concerned about my diet?" he asked sarcastically.

"Oh," I murmured, "that."

"Yes, that." His voice was bleak. "Don't you want to know if I drink
blood?"

I flinched. "Well, Jacob said something about that."

阿汤哥

“雅克布怎么说的？”他冷漠地问道。

“他说你不……猎食人类。他说你的家族应该不会有危险性，因为你们只猎食动物。”

“他说我们不危险？”他的声音里有着深深的怀疑。

“不太确切。他是说你们应该没有不危险。但奎鲁特人依然不想让你们踏入他们的土地，只是以防万一。”

他看着前方，但我说不准他是是不是在看路面。

“那他说得对吗？关于不猎食人类这一点？”我竭力让自己的声音尽可能地保持正常。

“奎鲁特人的记性不错。”他低声说道。

我把这句话当作一个肯定。
“不过，别因为这个沾沾自喜。”他警告我。“就和我们保持距离这一点来说，他们是正确的。我们依然很危险。”

“我不明白。”

“我们是在尝试，”他慢条斯理地解释着。“我们通常很善于自我控制。但有时我们会犯错误。我，比方说，让自己和你独处。”

“这是个错误？”我听出了自己声音里的悲哀，但我不知道他是否也能听出来。

“一个非常危险的错误。”他低声说着。
============================

"What did Jacob say?" he asked flatly.

"He said you didn't… hunt people. He said your family wasn't supposed to
be dangerous because you only hunted animals."

"He said we weren't dangerous?" His voice was deeply skeptical.

"Not exactly. He said you weren't supposed to be dangerous. But the
Quileutes still didn't want you on their land, just in case."

He looked forward, but I couldn't tell if he was watching the road or not.

"So was he right? About not hunting people?" I tried to keep my voice as
even as possible.

"The Quileutes have a long memory," he whispered.

I took it as a confirmation.

"Don't let that make you complacent, though," he warned me. "They're
right to keep their distance from us. We are still dangerous."

"I don't understand."

"We try," he explained slowly. "We're usually very good at what we do.
Sometimes we make mistakes. Me, for example, allowing myself to be alone
with you."

"This is a mistake?" I heard the sadness in my voice, but I didn't know
if he could as well.

"A very dangerous one," he murmured.

阿汤哥

然后，我们都沉默了。我看见前灯的光线在路面拐弯的地方扭曲着。它们移动得这样快，看上去一点也不真实，像是某个电视游戏。我意识到，时间过得这么快，就像车下漆黑的路面一样，我心头涌起一股可怕的恐惧感，生怕自己再也没有机会像这样和他在一起了——彼此开诚布公，我们之间的墙消失了，但仅此一次。他的话暗示着一切都结束了，一想到这个念头，我就畏缩起来。我不能再浪费我和他在一起的任何一分钟了。

“告诉我更多的事。”我不顾一切地问道，根本不在乎他说什么，只想再一次听到他的声音。
他飞快地看着我，为我语气的转变而震惊着：“你想要知道更多什么的？”

“告诉我你为什么猎食动物而非人类。”我建议道，声音里依然带着绝望的气息。我意识到自己的眼睛已经潮湿了，我反抗着那阵试图压制我的悲痛。

“我不想成为一个怪物。”他的声音很低。

“但动物并不能让你满足？”
他顿了顿：“当然，我不能肯定。但我可以把它比作靠豆-腐和豆-奶过活。我们称自己为素-食-者，这是我们私底下的小玩笑。这并不能完全满足饥饿——或者说，口渴。 It doesn't completely satiate the hunger-or rather thirst. But it keeps us strong enough to resist. 大多数时候是这样。”他的语气有所保留。“有些时候，这会比别的时候更困难些。”

“现在这对你来说很困难吗？”我问道。

他叹息着。“是的。”

“但你现在不饿。”我肯定地说——是陈述，而非询问。

“为什么你会这样想呢？”

“你的眼睛。我告诉过你我有一个理论。我注意到人们——尤其是男人——饥饿的时候会更暴躁些。”
=====================
We were both silent then. I watched the headlights twist with the curves
of the road. They moved too fast; it didn't look real, it looked like a
video game. I was aware of the time slipping away so quickly, like the
black road beneath us, and I was hideously afraid that I would never have
another chance to be with him like this again — openly, the walls between
us gone for once. His words hinted at an end, and I recoiled from the
idea. I couldn't waste one minute I had with him.

"Tell me more," I asked desperately, not caring what he said, just so I
could hear his voice again.

He looked at me quickly, startled by the change in my tone. "What more do
you want to know?"

"Tell me why you hunt animals instead of people," I suggested, my voice
still tinged with desperation. I realized my eyes were wet, and I fought
against the grief that was trying to overpower me.

"I don't want to be a monster." His voice was very low.

"But animals aren't enough?"

He paused. "I can't be sure, of course, but I'd compare it to living on
tofu and soy milk; we call ourselves vegetarians, our little inside joke.
It doesn't completely satiate the hunger — or rather thirst. But it keens
us strong enough to resist. Most of the time." His tone turned ominous.

"Sometimes it's more difficult than others."

"Is it very difficult for you now?" I asked.

He sighed. "Yes."

"But you're not hungry now," I said confidently — stating, not asking.

"Why do you think that?"

"Your eyes. I told you I had a theory. I've noticed that people — men in
particular — are crabbier when they're hungry."